Dear Harry and Zach,
I can’t believe you are four months old already. I remember reading while you were still nestled in my womb, that the first three to six months with twins is a blur. They were right, those other twin parents. I feel like the veil of constant tiredness is starting to lift. I am seeing the world clearly again, I am making plans for the future. All I can really remember of your first three months is your Papa coming down with gastro two days after we came home from hospital, and spending a great deal of time sitting on the lounge. Your first two months, I pretty much slept upright on the lounge. I was lucky if I spent more than an hour in bed each night. I thought my derrière would be permanently without feeling due to all the couch time spent feeding you. I wish I had taken more photos of the two of you in those early months, but I struggled to form a coherent sentence, I couldn’t even think about anything other than tending your needs. Also, I thought I’d have more time to take photos to remember the early days by. Funny that.
But now you are four months old, and my, how you have grown and changed in such a short time. Your feeds are down to as little as 10 minutes, and you sleep 7pm until 1.30am most nights, and then until between 4.30 and 6am when we are up with the birds. No more lounge sleeping for me (and I have feeling back in my butt).
It’s remarkable how close together you achieve your milestones. Zach, you smiled first, but Harry was only a few hours behind. You both giggled for the first time on the same day. Harry, you rolled tummy to back, followed 30 seconds later by Zachy. You can both roll back to tummy too.
While you both bounced around inside my belly, I honestly thought that I was having both a boy and a girl. The sonographers and obstitricians kept insisting you were both boys. I had a feeling that if you were in fact both boys, that you were identical. I got that bit right at least. Your personalities are so different already, and I think that’s what I was picking up when I was still growing you on the inside.
Zachy, you are my sensitive little soul. You need more snuggles than your older brother, but when you feel safe, you give us the most beautiful smiles. You babble away gooing, giggling and chatting to anyone who will listen. You find going to sleep and waking up hard, but you are comforted by arms, by soft words and kisses. You may have been born second, but you certainly aren’t falling behind in your development (in fact, you may just have overtaken Harry). We put you on the floor, and you roll over and over and over again. I’m not sure I’m ready for all the movement.
Harry, you are my chilled out little dude. You are usually happy to wait while your little brother is given some extra attention. You already look out for him, trying to comfort him by moving closer to him in your cot when he’s struggling in the arms of sleep. I think that’s the way it’s going to be, you taking care of your little brother, protecting him from the world, while he showers you with love. You’re happy just relaxing on your blanket on the floor, feet dancing in the air. You’ve rolled once each way, and have decided that’s enough for you.
We’ve just celebrated your first Christmas. You didn’t get much in the way of presents, but you got showered with love. You spent the day being cuddled and held by family, all enjoying the magic of your existence, and hinting to others that more babies are wanted.
Harry and Zach, your first few months may have passed in a blink of an eye, but at the same time, I feel a bond with you that feels like its been there forever. I feel I’ve waited my whole life to meet you, that there is a special purpose for you being given into my care.
I can’t wait to see what the next month brings.
Love Mama xx